We were about to dash out to school earlier this week when I caught sight of myself in the mirror. I was a little surprised and stopped for a second. The surprise was that the reflection staring back at me actually looked like me; Perhaps a slightly tired, slightly harassed version of me, but definitely me. My hair was clean and straightened, I was wearing make-up and I was in a new pair of jeans. I think it was the first time since E was born, almost 17 months ago, that I’ve looked or felt anything like the pre-baby me.
When you have a baby your life changes in an instant and you often find you have little or no time for yourself. For a while you lose yourself in nappies, feeding and taking care of this amazing new little person in your life. You always take second place and even squeezing a shower into nap time can seem like an impossible task. Whoever said that babies sleep all the time? Mine certainly didn’t.
After L was born I breastfed every 3 hours for what felt like forever and I could hardly fit in eating and washing, let alone a trip to the hair dresser for a trim. There were times I felt like I’d never be myself again, but of course I was. The overwhelming, all-consuming job of motherhood finally gets easier and you also get better at organising your time and making the most of every spare minute. For me, it took just over a year to feel ‘normal’ again. I’m sure there are other Mums who manage it sooner but for me those first 12 months were all baby and very little Mummy.
By the time I had my second little boy I was more prepared for the upheaval and I also knew that it was temporary. I had my hair coloured a little darker (less maintenance), resigned myself to no ‘beauty treatments’ (I’m talking about using a hairdryer and painting my own nails, nothing flashy!) and switched my shower time to after the boys went to bed so Mr C would be at home. I think I had more realistic expectations second time around. And while I knew that eventually I’d find time for myself again there were many occasions I looked in that very same mirror and sighed. What I saw was an exhausted Mum with a lined faced, bags under her eyes and untidy, thinning hair. I could barely remember what I looked like before.
Even at my most tired there were a couple of things I couldn’t bring myself to compromise on. I’m the kind of girl who can’t go out without makeup; No one wants or needs to see me barefaced on the school run so I always squeezed in foundation (the easy compact style) and a quick coat of mascara. I also really need to wash my hair every day and some days that was downright impossible. Lots of mornings I relied on dry shampoo and it was an absolute lifesaver for me.
Slowly over the last couple of months I’ve noticed that I have a few extra minutes here and there and most nights after 7.30pm, the evening is mine. I’m pretty sure I still smell of Sudocrem rather than Chanel but my hair is highlighted, my toe nails are painted and I’m wearing clothes that are definitely not suitable for breastfeeding. I’ve even just treated myself to a lovely pair of shoes in preparation for Christmas. That should be fun, it’s been a while since I’ve walked in heels! I am definitely feeling like me again, and it’s good to be back.
Mum's The Word UK 